Failing to find a fantastic time at university? Many share your feelings.

Students sharing experiences
A pair of university attendees talk about their journeys of college living.

One university attendee passed the majority of his orientation week looking at social media, seeing content about other students' fun nights out.

"I stayed indoors," Robert recalls, characterizing that period as the loneliest time of his life.

The people he lived with seldom socialized, and his course didn't feel very sociable.

Even though he made efforts by participating in sample activities for various societies, he couldn't find his people.

"I started to lose my self-assurance," he says. "I believed people didn't want to form friendships with me, or they weren't fond of me."

Social Media Comparisons

Initially, Robert had no intention of going to university and had a job offer for post-secondary education.

However he observed his peers enjoying themselves as university attendees on social media.

"When you need to wake up for work on Thursday at 9:00 and you observe peers partied on the previous evening, you do start thinking situations appear superior," Robert mentions.

College Anticipations

Media content and online platforms can glorify the idea of college existence.

Numerous students begin university with high expectations for what they think could be the most wonderful time of their lives.

Certain attendees begin their studies with "optimistic perspectives," says a counselling manager.

Research Results

  • In a poll of new students initially, the primary worry was finding their place and feeling included
  • Further studies through polling organizations, a significant minority said they lacked friendships at university
  • Over one-third reported they felt anxious regularly about building relationships

Personal Journeys

A different attendee's TikTok feed was full of videos of girls having fun while sharing accommodation in student houses.

But when she transferred from her previous location to campus to learn reporting, she found orientation period "daunting" because of the drinking culture it involved.

She abstains from alcohol and had avoided party scenes before.

"I utilized much of orientation inside my accommodation," she says. "I merely sensed somewhat isolated."

Emotional Wellbeing Factors

According to recent research of numerous undergraduate students, nearly one-third reported they contemplated withdrawing from studies.

The main cause was their mental and emotional health, accompanied by economic considerations.

"Anxiety about these multiple factors is very widespread, and typical," adds a mental health professional.

Identifying Resolutions

Eventually, the students all found their feet and built connections.

She built connections via her studies and via social media, while another student became more content when she could to share accommodation with peers.

Practical Advice

In his case, presently older and in his last year, it was joining his university's drama society and employment during studies that helped him make friends.

The suggested approach to first-year students experiencing connection challenges is to simply leave your accommodation and participate in group trial sessions.

"Subsequent to periods of regular attendance, others notice your presence," he explains, "you notice their presence, and friendships begin forming."

Andrew Stevens
Andrew Stevens

A tech journalist and AI researcher with over a decade of experience covering digital innovations and emerging technologies.